After the year that was 2016, I think I’ll be more pessimistic in my approach. That way I can be pleasantly surprised when things go better than I expect, yes? Maybe.
Exhibit B: I love the music, especially the really religious songs like Handel’s Messiah, Silent Night, and Away in a Manger. I also love the old-school Amy Grant Xmas album (as in, the one from the 80’s)
I also love the Sufjan Stevens Christmas album, which includes my very favourite hymn:
Here’s our Xmas card for 2016 — you’ll notice there’s two more names than there are people in the picture. These two aren’t yet a part of our family, but that doesn’t mean I don’t think about them every day.
I’m not sure if Olivia and Eli ever check this page, but in case they do, here’s a message, just for them: I don’t know you yet, but you should know that you are already in my heart. Your pictures are up, your stockings are hung on the fireplace, and there is a space for you that will always be here. So please, come to us. Meet me for a coffee and cake, and I’ll pay — plus, I promise to just listen. Much love.
I’ve been wondering why my blog here has been so quiet over the last couple years (outside of NaBloPoMo) — especially since this used to be the space where I would take so much time to process and write about what I was thinking/going through in my life. I initially thought my lack-of-posting was due to being too busy, or the fact that it’s easier to throw a thought on social media than it is to post a blog entry, but …
I think the primary reason why I’m no longer posting so much here is due to how my personality has been changing to be more inward in nature. My shift from an E[xtravert] to an I[ntrovert] is finally complete. I’m just not that outward when it comes to processing what I’m thinking inside.
Now granted, part of my posting hesitancy is due to knowing that there be trolls who stalk me online (hi!!), but even beyond this oft-neglected blog space, I’m finding that I’m just not that vocal with others about what I’m thinking about.
Beyond my therapist (who I only check in with a couple times a year), I’m just not that talkative about what goes on with me. Maybe it’s just easier to get someone else to do the talking, because I do like to listen & help. But I can’t help but think that this inward drive I’ve been experiencing over the last little while isn’t helping me out as much as I think it is.