newest jam

[Verse 1]
There’s a bird making coffee in the kitchen
And there’s a rifle out back smoking cigarettes
He don’t ever really feel like talking
It don’t matter what she says

[Verse 2]
And the bird is always dreaming out the window
Looking at that big wide open sky
And the rifle, he used to be a dreamer
But he wasn’t meant to fly

Something down on the ground
Won’t let her out, it holds her in
And he’s afraid if she flies
She’ll never come home again
Something about the bird
And her spreading those wings
Always brings the rifle out in him

[Verse 3]
But the rifle loves the bird when she’s singing
And he knows every word to every song
And the bird, she loves the rifle
Cause he’s dangerous, stubborn and strong

Something down on the ground
Won’t let her out, it holds her in
And he’s afraid if she flies
She’ll never come home again
Something about the bird
And her spreading those wings
Always brings the rifle out in him

[Verse 4]
One night when the autumn wind was perfect
The rifle drank his whiskey and went to bed
And he never even heard the window open
And she ain’t come back in

… 6 months later

well, hello there.

In the last 6 months, I have:

Ran my first half-marathon (13.1 mi/21.5 km)

Graduated with my MEd

Published a paper with my colleagues

Taught 5 courses (4 undergrad + 1 grad)

Moved to a new house

… in addition to mama-ing, gardening, being with friends and loved ones, and overall living my life outside this blog.

I’m hoping to use this space a little more in the coming days, though I’m not sure how transparent I can be — there’s lots of people who tend to troll this space for information to use against me. But — it hasn’t silenced me yet, and I’m not about to let it start! Does anyone other than trolls still check out this page anymore?

I promise I won’t take another 6 months to post. Well, hopefully not. <3

Why I’m marching on Saturday

This Saturday women across North America (and around the world) are taking part in the Women’s March on Washington, in response to Donald Trump being elected president. I’ll be a part of the march here in Saskatoon, and I can’t wait.

Flare Magazine did a feature called “Why I’m Marching”: 32 Women on Why The Women’s March,” and the piece’s author contacted me to explain why I’m participating. Here’s what I said:

Today’s the inauguration of Donald Trump, so the days of denial that all this is happening will be over as of 11:28am EST.  To commemorate the occasion, I’m wearing all my Hillary swag to school, and will do my best to avoid using Trump’s words as every example of what NOT to say when communicating.

surprisingly strong

I try to have a daily practice of finding moments of gratitude.

The other day I found myself feeling grateful for all the times I’ve surprised myself with how strong I can be. And no, this isn’t me having a #humblebrag. I can think back to many times when I was surprisingly strong.

Sometimes I find unexpected physical strength.  This past summer, for example, I was surprised when I realized how good yoga has been for my body. When I started up with Spartan boot camp, I was in a really good place — my arms and core were strong. I had thought my yoga practice was more for my mind and spirit strength, but it looks like there’s quite a few unexpected physical benefits too.

But the other ways I’ve been surprisingly strong is when I look back to the times when I felt so weak (especially at the time). When I look back to how far I’ve come, there had to be some serious strength in order to do what I did.

It took strength to move from Savannah, GA to Saskatoon, SK. When I think about moving across one country to begin a life in an entirely different country, I don’t know if I could do it today. But I did do it, when I was only 24 years old.

It took strength to leave relationships that weren’t healthy. The other day I found an old journal of mine, where back in 2008 I was very sad and wrote about how trapped and lonely I felt. At that time, I didn’t feel like I had any options but to stay in a relationship where I wasn’t being supported. But, somehow, I found strength to stand up for myself and the needs I have, and leave a relationship where I wasn’t being cared for. It wasn’t always easy (as much of my sad-sack posts of 2014 can attest to), but I did it. Because I’m strong.

This last year hasn’t always been the easiest, in terms of the personal struggles I’ve gone through or have witnessed in my loved ones’ lives. When I look back on some of what’s happened, I’m surprised at how I got through it.

So, for today, I’m grateful for the inner reserve I’ve got within me. Here’s hoping it won’t be tested too much in the coming New Year.

last run of 2016

It was a snowy, solitary, slow (!), but so serene last outdoor run of 2016. I added up my tracked mileage for the year, and I’ve ran 528km (328mi). I’m still in disbelief that these wonky feet of mine took me that far. Running outside on these trails is my sanctuary, and I find such relief in making my lungs burn. Today I’m grateful for wet socks, white eyelashes, and a happy heart. Happy NYE, and bring on more kms in 2017.